Sorry this took so long to post. I literally started 5 different versions of it. It's more of a "bridge" post anyway.
How the heck am I supposed to cover 4 amazing weeks in one post?!
While Tucker was gone, and especially during the last few months, I tried really hard to not think about life in "what if"s. I tried to be honest with myself and face the reality that no one knows the future and that anything could happen and so it's best to just not have any expectations.
Everyone told me he'd be weird, that it would take some time for him to adjust to life outside of missionary world, so that's what I prepared myself for.
But Tucker was..........normal.
Actually, I take that back. He was more than normal. Before he left, we weren't boyfriend and girlfriend, we didn't hold hands in front of people, we weren't "official." And here he was, now an RM, and he was ready to jump head first into real dating. People would ask me, "How is it having him back? Is it weird?" And I'd answer, "Uh...yeah. Really weird. But only because it's so normal!"
While I'd hoped the transition would be easy, I was still shocked at how natural it was to be together again. We laughed easily. The old inside jokes resurfaced, and we quickly made new ones. We loved being together. I'm definitely NOT going to say it was like he never left, because hey! It's been 2 years! We've both changed a lot! But we remained best friends through all of it. Only a couple of days after he returned, we were sitting on the couch talking, and I asked him if he had expected "us" to fall so easily back into place. He explained that he did because while in the mission field, he worked really hard to be the best missionary he could, but that he realized that now that he's home, it was time to transition to life. In fact, I was more awkward than he was. Sure, he still had missionary quirks, like introducing himself as "Elder Denton" and drawing parallels to the Atonement during a swim lesson, but he was definitely still the same energetic, spiritual, silly, loud, romantic, wonderful Tucker.
We spent every day together, literally. His mom used the term "whirlwind" to describe it, and I guess that's exactly what it was. Within a week of his return, we'd gone on our second "first" date, met most of each other's extended family, had our first kiss (yes, it was really THE first for both of us. No, it was not awkward at all. Yes, it was totally awesome. Save that story for later.), talked about rings, and discussed possible wedding dates. Fast? Yeah. But you have to remember that this was a looooooooooooooong time coming. and suddenly, there was nothing really in the way of plans moving forward. We'd both lived our lives up until that point in a way that when the time came, we were ready for it. I'll admit though, I definitely had some nerves the first few days. Nothing I could pinpoint, but just plain old nerves and worrying for no reason. But we talked everything out, and the nervousness disappeared.
On Wednesday, exactly a week after he got back, we were finally able to slip away from parents and siblings and grandparents and cousins for a date with just the two of us. Being the romantic he is, Tucker planned this "first" date to be the same as our "last" date before he left. We drove out to a desert campground and watched the sun set (no picnic this time because I was still getting over my nasty food poisoning from a week earlier) and the stars appear. I returned his "treasure" box that I'd kept safe, along with a collection letters I'd written over the last two years that were way too whiny and angsty to actually send him, and he pulled out the sealed envelope that had stayed untouched inside the treasure box for over 2 years and read it to me. A beautiful letter addressed to me that he'd written during the 7 months we were "broken up" before his mission.
The next three weeks were full of adventure. We didn't spend a lot of time doing nothing - we filled our schedules with running errands for our moms, going to sibling recitals, swimming, spending time with old friends, eating otter-pops, watching younger siblings, cutting and juicing hundreds of pounds of citrus, catching up on movies and music, going on dates. We even went to Lake Powell over Memorial Day with his family and had a blast. Nothing like seeing each other at 5 AM, smelling like the lake, and sleeping in tents to make you think they must be crazy for loving you, but that you really must love them too. ;) Mostly, we just really tried to enjoy our time with each other and not think about the fact that I was moving to Belgium exactly one month from the day he returned.
Despite the looming separation, plans moved forward. We discussed possible wedding dates, anywhere from this August immediately after I got back, all the way to the end of next summer. We looked at school schedules and narrowed down our options and then prayed and prayed and prayed. It seemed like fall would be the best option, but with me leaving, it left very little time for planning. We came to the conclusion that we'd start planning the big stuff with our parents and then make things official when I got home from Belgium at the end of August. I started browsing wedding dresses, sending private messages to friends about vendors, and pricing different things. I was a little bummed that he wouldn't be proposing before I left, but I was fine with it and recognized the difficulties he'd have in finding a ring with less than two weeks left.
Life continued on, more wonderful than I ever imagined. I realized just how much I missed all the little things like his involuntary grin as he reached for my hand while he drove, or how he starts getting loopy around 10 PM every night, or his witty sense of humor, or the feel of his hugs, or singing along to the radio at the top of our lungs, or how he'd wink at me from across the room. Every morning I woke up to the realization that he was actually home and that I actually got to see him and hear his voice. Everyday was a new adventure, but while I absolutely loved dating him, I was anxious to make things official once I got home from my summer job. Apparently, though, that sly stinker was a little more anxious. ;)
While I'd hoped the transition would be easy, I was still shocked at how natural it was to be together again. We laughed easily. The old inside jokes resurfaced, and we quickly made new ones. We loved being together. I'm definitely NOT going to say it was like he never left, because hey! It's been 2 years! We've both changed a lot! But we remained best friends through all of it. Only a couple of days after he returned, we were sitting on the couch talking, and I asked him if he had expected "us" to fall so easily back into place. He explained that he did because while in the mission field, he worked really hard to be the best missionary he could, but that he realized that now that he's home, it was time to transition to life. In fact, I was more awkward than he was. Sure, he still had missionary quirks, like introducing himself as "Elder Denton" and drawing parallels to the Atonement during a swim lesson, but he was definitely still the same energetic, spiritual, silly, loud, romantic, wonderful Tucker.
We spent every day together, literally. His mom used the term "whirlwind" to describe it, and I guess that's exactly what it was. Within a week of his return, we'd gone on our second "first" date, met most of each other's extended family, had our first kiss (yes, it was really THE first for both of us. No, it was not awkward at all. Yes, it was totally awesome. Save that story for later.), talked about rings, and discussed possible wedding dates. Fast? Yeah. But you have to remember that this was a looooooooooooooong time coming. and suddenly, there was nothing really in the way of plans moving forward. We'd both lived our lives up until that point in a way that when the time came, we were ready for it. I'll admit though, I definitely had some nerves the first few days. Nothing I could pinpoint, but just plain old nerves and worrying for no reason. But we talked everything out, and the nervousness disappeared.
 |
| T: "Hey, Mom! Look! Can we do this for our engagement pictures? Please?" |
On Wednesday, exactly a week after he got back, we were finally able to slip away from parents and siblings and grandparents and cousins for a date with just the two of us. Being the romantic he is, Tucker planned this "first" date to be the same as our "last" date before he left. We drove out to a desert campground and watched the sun set (no picnic this time because I was still getting over my nasty food poisoning from a week earlier) and the stars appear. I returned his "treasure" box that I'd kept safe, along with a collection letters I'd written over the last two years that were way too whiny and angsty to actually send him, and he pulled out the sealed envelope that had stayed untouched inside the treasure box for over 2 years and read it to me. A beautiful letter addressed to me that he'd written during the 7 months we were "broken up" before his mission.
The next three weeks were full of adventure. We didn't spend a lot of time doing nothing - we filled our schedules with running errands for our moms, going to sibling recitals, swimming, spending time with old friends, eating otter-pops, watching younger siblings, cutting and juicing hundreds of pounds of citrus, catching up on movies and music, going on dates. We even went to Lake Powell over Memorial Day with his family and had a blast. Nothing like seeing each other at 5 AM, smelling like the lake, and sleeping in tents to make you think they must be crazy for loving you, but that you really must love them too. ;) Mostly, we just really tried to enjoy our time with each other and not think about the fact that I was moving to Belgium exactly one month from the day he returned.
Despite the looming separation, plans moved forward. We discussed possible wedding dates, anywhere from this August immediately after I got back, all the way to the end of next summer. We looked at school schedules and narrowed down our options and then prayed and prayed and prayed. It seemed like fall would be the best option, but with me leaving, it left very little time for planning. We came to the conclusion that we'd start planning the big stuff with our parents and then make things official when I got home from Belgium at the end of August. I started browsing wedding dresses, sending private messages to friends about vendors, and pricing different things. I was a little bummed that he wouldn't be proposing before I left, but I was fine with it and recognized the difficulties he'd have in finding a ring with less than two weeks left.
Life continued on, more wonderful than I ever imagined. I realized just how much I missed all the little things like his involuntary grin as he reached for my hand while he drove, or how he starts getting loopy around 10 PM every night, or his witty sense of humor, or the feel of his hugs, or singing along to the radio at the top of our lungs, or how he'd wink at me from across the room. Every morning I woke up to the realization that he was actually home and that I actually got to see him and hear his voice. Everyday was a new adventure, but while I absolutely loved dating him, I was anxious to make things official once I got home from my summer job. Apparently, though, that sly stinker was a little more anxious. ;)
Chapter 5: The Proposal Story
I'm totally being a blog stalker right now, but reading some of these posts totally took me back to those similar feelings the week my missionary came home and getting engaged two weeks later! <3
ReplyDeleteI feel like I could totally relate to this and it makes me wish I had a friend like you who was experiencing waiting for a missionary at the same time that I was! A "whirlwind" definitely seems like the best word to describe those two weeks between my missionary coming home, just being best friends and falling in love all over again, despite everyone's worries and concerns about him being "not normal" and it "not working out", talking about wedding plans, saving money for a ring, wedding, etc., and getting engaged two weeks later! I don't know you very well, but I'm supper happy for you! Your mom made my wedding cake at our wedding, too :)! Congrats, girl!